Goin down the road feelin...?

Dancing, twirling, sitting still, still dancing in my head.
Running away from the past, just brings me closer to the present.
One day I will have to learn to feel everything, to digest it whole.
That’s the worst thing that I can think of at this point.

I’ve been perfectly fine, well as fine as bad can get and still be fine.
I’ve ridden the waves, out the perfect storm, the broken sunsets of life; and lived to tell.
It’s not so bad. It’s about the best that I can give and get back in exchange.
I have hurt as much as I’ve hurt. Yet I’ve loved till it hurt worse.

My brain moves at the perfect rate of a class V river.
Then it freezes over like 2 am in January.
Nothing moving, nothing has to.
Silence, bitter cold, darkness….

I wake up to the sound of my head.
It’s complicated…it’s simple…it senselessly makes no sense.
At the same time it’s refreshing.
If all my thoughts were clear…what would be the point?

I grab on tight to the last little bit of sanity and hold on for dear life.
I’m just not sure who’s life I’m holding on for.
Is it better to live for someone.
Is it better to have someone live for you.

It’s the crystal blue aspects of a normal life that throw me.
Live the life you want to live, they say. But what’s that?
I’m a dreamer, yet somewhere my dreams turned on me.
Somewhere I fell out of my head into my life and I don’t think I landed on my feet.

I am searching for my cash cab to come and pick me up.
I think I have enough random knowledge to kill it.
Then it can drop me off at the mountain top.
Give me what I need, not what I want for once. That’s all I ask